More than numb

Some shit may have broken your heart,

but it opened your eyes.

Take that as win.

/

If you ever want to leave

just tell me.

Don't keep me in your life 

to gain confidence and energy 

from my affection, loyalty and genuinely kindness.

Let me go,

so I can pour my time,

patience and love into someone

who'll value and respect me.

Don't let me to become cold

just to avoid hurt.

/

You can't just touch my soul

and leave.

我可以一個人 也很好。

如果文字可以療傷
我們試試。

別人看見

你低潮的文章

總會以爲你怎麽了

是不是太多愁善感

而你不知道怎麽解釋

其實每一天都是這樣子

心底裏總是默默承受世界的重量

只是沒有説出口而已

。

|

有些痛

不想
再嘗試

但

我似乎
並沒有選擇的權利

。

|

如果你不想疼愛我

就請你不要進入我的生活吧

。

Fear

When it comes to a relationship

I always have no luck.

Mary Jane - Far from home

I felt that,

I really do.

|

There is so much grace
in staying soft
so much beauty
in being kind
so much tenderness
in showing love
and so much soul
in being real

|

The biggest risk
is to put others before me.
But I often have no choice.

It's not about
how I want a love like this in return.

Please.
don't judge.
This is how I function.

I love hard.
When the love is reciprocate
I love even harder.

When I say I have no choice
when an overthinker said
they have no choice
trust them.

What love has taught me

"When people treat you like they don't care,

believe them."

.

Once upon a time

She made him breakfast every day

but will never get a single compliment

about how it tastes

or

even thanks.

That's it.

The story taught me

if the person treats you like

they don't care,

believe them.

Yes, I felt that.

Sometimes, you have to accept the truth

and stop wasting time on the wrong people.

/

I read something like,

"If he misses you,

he will call just to hear your voice."

If he wants you, he will say it.

And if he cares, he will show it.

If he has thought about you,

it will come out of his mouth.

If you are on his mind non stop,

he will do anything he can just to see you.

If he truly likes you,

he will fight back just to keep you in his arms.

Energy should be equal.

Don't give me excuses.

It's about priority.

If I don't worth your fight

I'd not interfere with your life.

"You're going to feel that

when you see her loving someone else

the way she tried to love you."

People will never know

what they lost because let's be honest,

they never knew what they had.

近況。

最近

就是精神有點恍惚

黑眼圈有點深

有點心不在焉

想把精神寄托在工作

讓自己忙碌一點。

本性難移

是真的。

自己有點像

被放任很久的野馬

有點被勒不住。

如果

你喜歡我

一定是因爲我的真性情

我的可愛

我的毫無所謂

努力認真

真誠貼心

善良和浪漫

。

這大概是我第一次

這麽大方

稱贊自己吧
。

愛自己多一點

愛自己多一點

。

這樣

我才有力量

愛我愛的人

。

一直以爲

我把圍墻建得挺高的

但原來還不夠

我的心

真的好累

。

大人的世界

怎麽連哭都要選時間了

。

我只是一個小人類

世界疼愛我多一點好嗎。

Fate

A flower with scent never seeks attention.

It attracts.

/

They say,

no matter how good I am

I will never be enough

for a person who are not ready to be a man.

The best thing I should have done

is to stop fighting for someone who was ohkay

with losing me.

It was hard.

But I should have learned to do so

/

Darling.

If you could look into my heart

you will know how to be not cruel.

Selflove

Let go.

Let go to give yourself peace of mind.

Let go because whatever is meant to be

will be.

I've cried over people

only to realize that losing them was better for me

in the long run.

/

I didn't want to try.

I didn't want to play games.

It's not about

I'm not willing to take the risk.

It's about I am guaranteed to get the ache

again

for the person that doesn't value my soul.

/

I wanted to love fiercely again

to love
 to give it all again

but
I fear pain.

/

I want to love the man who brags about me

when I'm not around

just like how I'd brag of him.

I want to love the man

who makes it safe to lay on his chest

while he strokes my hair

when I had a bad day

just like how I want to be

the most supportive person for his battle.

I want to love a person

that knowing my inner beauty is irreplaceable

because my skin will fade.

I want to love a person

who I can laugh with play with

and not bored with it

and we love each other so much

that we really make the days count.

/

Please do not awaken my love

with no intention of loving me.

/

I didn't want to be

just an option to someone

who just wants to fill his emptiness

This is why I have to learn

to hold back.

To stop putting so much effort

into someone who treats me

good in a day

but treats me like I never exist

the other day.

/

Dear heavenly Father,

I know you have taught me to wait.

I still believe

there is another person like me

that treasure love

loyalty

and kindness.

Caterpillar in progress

I'm still learning to be who I am.

My habits have constantly changed and tweaked

to fit my purpose.

My mind has a constant battle to be better

to overcome fears, anxiety, and doubts.

I'm still learning

to be me.

To explore more from my comfort shell.

It is messy sometimes

but it's beautiful

because I learned to not allow

hindrances of the world to keep me

from becoming who I really am

to become

the better version of myself.

/

I can endure the pain of growth

as long as I grow

just like how I love weights and spin.

Little do you know

It's never easy to detach with a person

that I've had close ties with.

/

Having some extreme personality

in the same person is weird.

Blur to the max

that the few of you might know

how well I mastered this skill.

But when it comes to people

heart and soul

I get attached so fast

where I can never learn

how to hold back or to leave.

Being observant and detailed

I often melt with

the person that has
the same personality as me.

When the click is there

I do everything I can 

to make them happy.

It's never been about what I want,

it's always everyone's needs before me.
I mean
the person I value.

This is where

I give out too many chances to people,

who quite frankly,

fade and do not appreciate them.

They take advantages

and I become a pushover.

And even if they screw me over,

I didn't know why I will still be there.

/

I put my walls high

but once it's down

I give it all.

If you didn't want to stay in my life

Please,

don't ever break my wall.

I didn't want lessons

from the person I met

I just want good memories.

Fragile

Why am I the type of person that still believes 

someone's a good person
even when they've shown me in every way
they're not.

/

She knows me so well

that one of the toughest jobs in my life

is to let go even when holding on

only gives me bruises and scars.

It's my mistake.

My fault.

Keeping myself in jeopardy.

/

I didn't want games.

I didn't want hide and seek.

I just want a person

that understand in our little silences,

you know how much love has hurt me.

The biggest barrier

is that I need reassurance.

Because my anxiety and past have convinced me

that people don't actually want

and you'll just end up leaving like everyone else.

/

Let me go or hold me

but don't make me stand on the crossroads

of your feelings.

/

I am a petite lady

with a fragile heart.

Please,

handle me with care.